Thank you for waking up me today and giving my family, friends and me another day to have a shot at the title. Thank you for all my past experiences, present experiences and future experiences to come. Help me to continue to do YOUR WILL no matter the cost, the hurt, the pain, and the losses I will endure. Most of all, help me to continue to instill ie., share your love, power, strength, and hope in those who have lost their way or was never even taught about you and all the wonderful things you have done. You know every hair on my head before I was born and being “intricately woven in my mother’s womb,” (Psalms 139:13). Please excuse me for feeling emotional as I share my deepest letter to you with the world. I pray furthermore that you continue to take anything out my heart that is not like you.
You have carried me through very difficult times and told me to praise you even if it hurts, but you promised me that I would be ok and bear more fruits than I can imagine. I followed your lead with many nights of anger and despair. Here we are 13 years later, and I am a licensed professional and owning my own practice, providing substance abuse and co0occuring treatment to my community. I have flourished mentally, emotionally and spiritually since I decided to let you take the wheel.
I have learned through the years as well as my own experience, when trouble arises we tend to get so upset with you and even want to disown you, through the disbelief that you could allow such horrid things to happen to humans. In contrast, when things are going good we are so thrilled, excited and praising you all up and down the street. I come to understand, its the praises during the most difficult times that you are beyond closest. When we can’t pray and utter words, you know our heart and the holy spirit intercedes for us. There is a deep cry that is embedded in the bone gristle that causes us to shut down. Most importantly, you know all too well. But through it all, you are there.
When we think our life is dark, our faith and love for you create light This world appears dark to some. But I want them to know that life can be a beautiful place if they let it. Lord, you created us to be MASTERS OF THE WORLD, NOT SLAVES. Let me explain, thoughts lead to behavior, we are supposed to tame those negative thoughts so they do not lead to negative behaviors that can and will cause harm. We should be loving, kind and compassionate to one another regardless of religion., race, gender or creed.
Everyone has experienced trauma in some way shape or form, some realize it and some don’t. Lord, I know that all the hurtful things we all experienced in our life were for your WILL. I know deep in my heart of hearts that it hurt you more than me or any other human on this earth that you had to let us experience those things. The biggest catch of it all is going back to being the MASTER and persevering through those issues so that we can share our experiences such as mental, physical and spiritual survival tactics with the next person to help them get through their crisis. Many times people give up, but I don’t want them to give up. I want to continue to be that iron sharpening iron, so one person sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17) as my father taught me. I try to instill this practice into all my clients and anyone who takes the time to talk to me.
Enclosing, Lord, please help me be a blessing to others despite what our differences may be. I pray that I make you proud along with my ancestors and loved ones who are with me and no longer here on earth. I know that I truly, walk with the angels that are seen and unseen. With that being said, please forgive me for my sin that was seen and unseen and done underneath the sun. Help me continue to put your WILL first and not mine. Help me to always think first, pray for guidance and get the clearance from you before I make any decisions. As my father says “You are the Captain of the Ship”.
Your loving child,